Friday, November 23, 2007

I Am My Mother's Daughter

My mom likes to claim that I'm nothing like her. That after waiting years to have a daughter, she was shocked to find out I'm not what she expected. That I am, in fact, much more like my father. Well, while I tend to gravitate more towards my father's personality, there are things I do in my life that make me realize just how much like my mother I really am.
Case in point:
-There's no one in this world that likes my dad more than me, except my mom.
-I'm sorry mom, but my embarrassing inability to dance stems from you. You can't be offended, cuz I'm saying I'm the same way.
-Sarcasm. Enough said.

I could continue, but there's one trait in particular that, for some reason, I never noticed until recently. The names of our dolls.

Back in the day, my mom and her sister got these two dolls. Aunt Patti thought "Treetop" was a beautiful name for a doll. So my mom, being the realistic person she is, thought the doll might fall out of said tree top, and when she did it would go "Thud." So that's what she named her doll. Seriously, I dare you to find someone with a weirder doll name than "Thud."

So, years later, I come along. I can't remember all my dolls names, but my brother's are very fond of some of them (or maybe it's that they're fond of making fun of them...). Namely: Vanilla, Product 19 and Spoon Truck Nonsense. Now, I clearly remember naming the one "Vanilla" because she was the exact color of the vanilla ice cream my dad ate from Schwan's. As for the other two, I have no reasonable explanation other than to say I am my mother's daughter and that's all there is to it.

Tuesday, November 20, 2007

Pilgrims+Indians=Good Food

Preamble: This is my list of "thanks." Not the serious I'm-grateful-for-my-family type "Thanks," but the trite, I-could-live-without-this-but-I'm-glad-I-don't-have-to, type "Thanks."

-I'm grateful for the movie 'Swiss Family Robinson.' 

-I'm grateful for useless, waste-of-paper magazines that gossip about celebrities I think are lame cuz it keeps me amused when my flight is delayed.

-I'm grateful for dead cow. It ties with chocolate covered strawberries as my favorite food. I don't think I will get to eat either of them on the actual Day of Thanks. Ironic.

-I'm grateful for my pillows. They make it fun to go to bed at night.

-I'm grateful for warm weather in AZ. I don't like scraping ice off my windshield and now I don't have to.

-I'm grateful for ice water. It's my favorite thing to drink.

-I'm grateful I found people in AZ that play soccer. Soccer is good.

-I'm grateful for the band ABBA. It always makes me happy.

I'm grateful for lots more things-but this list is getting long and I don't want to alienate the few readers I do have by waxing too loquacious. 

What's on your list of "Thanks"?

Friday, November 16, 2007

You Have to Eat the Bad to Get the Good

'Member that one post I wrote about lame fortune cookies. 
Well, I got a really good one the other day...finally. Seriously, I don't know how many fortune cookies I had to eat before I got a for real fortune, but this was fully worth the wait. And it follows all the parameters that fortune cookies should. Well, the only parameter, which is that is should include an actual fortune.

You will inherit a large sum of money.

Sweet! I don't know where or when this will happen, but I'm pretty sure I'm thrilled. What do I plan to do with my money, you ask? I'll tell you.

1. Quit my job. Work Schmirk.
2. Find a guy that wants me to be his sugar mama. I can cuz I inherited a large sum of money, remember. I'm not getting any guys off my stellar looks and winning personality so I'll have to snag them with my money.
3. Go to Germany-cuz I've always wanted to. Oh wait...I'm already going there. Okay, I'll upgrade to first class.
4. I'm open to suggestions from here. If you have good ideas for me please share. I've got a large sum of money to spend, you know.

Monday, November 12, 2007

I Found Him!

That's right, folks. I've found the *MAN* of my dreams. Finally!!
I'm not even joking. This guy has won me over with his red hair, unintentional nerdiness, and most importantly, his ability to make me laugh non-stop. 
The saying, "There's a lid for every pot," is true. And I've found my proverbial lid. Actually, I think I wanna be the lid. I'm not certain being compared to a pot is necessarily a good thing. 
Now, if it turns out that this guy is not available, my second choice is Seth Green.

*The stars and capital letters mean you're supposed to click on that word. It takes you to the link that initiated my infatuation.*

Saturday, November 10, 2007

I'm so excited! I'm so...Scared!

Good things about waking up early to work out:
1. When you come home from work, you're already finished! Your evening is free for non-work out activities.
2. Saved by the Bell is on for a full two hours on TBS in the mornings! This is something I would never have known if I was not channel surfing while I treadmilled at 6:30am the other day.
3. .... Okay, apparently those are the only two things.

Friday, November 9, 2007

The 80's

Here's the thing. The decade known as 1980 brought forth a myriad of wonderful things; myself included. Other positive things worth mentioning from said decade: Pac-Man, Frogger, Teddy Ruxpin, Karate Kid, a time machine made out of a Delorian, normal Michael Jackson, Cosby Show, Breakfast Club, some lesser known bands like Van Halen and Def Leppard....basically, the list is endless.
However, one iconic highlight of the 80's, that should have stayed in the 80's is the fashion. Cauliflower bangs, mis-matched flourescent leggings, acid wash. Need I say more? No, I do not-but I will. One of the worst, if not the worst, fashion items was (were?) pegged pants. Gross. Not flattering unless you're insanely skinny, and even still-not a good idea. Unfortunately, this trend seems to be returning in the "new" skinny jean. I say "new"-cuz let's be honest, it's not new, it's a recycled trend. I firmly believe that the skinny jean should be avoided by all persons; especially boys. That's right all you high school aged, anorexically skinny 15-18 year old "skaters." Don't wear skinny jeans. Especially ones so skinny you can't even pull them past the bottom of your gluteus maximus and the legs are so tight they cut off circulation to your feet. Yuck.
With that being said, I have found the one exception to skinny jeans. It came in the form of my ridiculously cute niece, Kennedy. She's almost two, and she was rockin' her own pair of skinny jeans the other day, and I gotta say-she looked awesome. Now, her mother is much more fashion savvy than I. It's possible that skinny jeans are, in fact, cool and will only get bigger. However, I think they're lame and I promise you'll never see me wear them.

Friday, November 2, 2007


Here are some tips on how to be happy:

#1. Don't lie. Ever. Don't even embellish. Pretend you meet someone that you might like. PLEASE avioid the temptation to make yourself look good by stretching the truth. If anything were to ever happen with said person, you'd have to confess which could possibly result in making that person change their mind about the "something" that's happening. Or, you could always try to cover up the lie, which in turn forces you to lie more to cover up that lie, and lie again to cover up the lie that covered up the only gets worse. Don't do it!

Of course, this applies to life in general; not just potential-significant-other situations. That's just the one that's foremost on my mind for reaons that do not need to be elaborated at present.

#2. Find your nearest local library and read some good books. Books are fun. Read them.

#3. Eat chocolate.

#4. Spend time with family. If you don't like your family, learn to, and then spend time with them.

#5. Don't be dramatic. That's just annoying.