Monday, September 29, 2008

7 Is My Favorite Number

I've been double tagged--so here it comes.


7 Things That Attract Me To The Opposite Sex
1. Makes me laugh
2. Genuine
3. Thoughtful
4. Athletic
5. Ridiculously good looking (shut up---I am NOT shallow)
6. Red hair
7. Doesn't hurt if he plays guitar

7 of my Favorite Foods
1. Steak
2. Chocolate covered strawberries
3. Red Potatoes
4. Swiss Cheese
5. White Airheads
6. Hershey's kisses----just plain chocolate ones. No nuts---those are yuck.
7. Mama's wheat bread

7 Things I Can Not Do
1. Sing
2. Flirt
3. Curl my hair
4. Use an eyelash curler
5. Scrapbook
6. Use multiple exclamation marks or silly acronyms
7. Basically---I can not behave like a normal girl

7 Celebrity's I Admire
1. Paris Hilton. How amazing is it that she looked hot in her mug-shot?
2. Jessica Simpson. Cuz saving herself for marriage and then turning into a tramp right after is awesome, right?
3. Oprah. I only wish I could be that self-absorbed/self-promoting.
4. Brad Pitt. Way to leave your wife for another woman but make yourself look good by becoming all "Humanitarian" right after. Seriously, mad props to you.
5. George Clooney. Very impressive that you've chosen to remain a non-celibate bachelor to capitalize on your status as a heart-throb. I'm sure you'll find lasting fulfillment as a result of that.
6. Lindsay Lohan. I just think it's great that the little girls who love seeing you in Parent Trap now have such a wonderful role-model.
7. Cloris Leachman. Nice that you have aged gracefully by going on a reality TV show and acting like a child and dropping F-bombs all over the place.

7 Things I Say Most Often
1. For the love
2. I know, right?
3. Oh hey.
4. Oh, honestly.
5. Girl, I will cut you. Okay---I don't really say that, but Bon Qui Qui does and I kind of want to be her.
6. It's hot as a beast!
7. Right. About that.

7 Things I Can Do
1. Make killer apple pie
2. Remember dates like it's nobody's business
3. Play "When the Saints Go Marching In" on the harmonica
4. A spot on impersonation of Madam Mim
5. Destroy people's study habits---just ask my old roommates. I'm a pro.
6. Keep secrets
7. Find ridiculously awesome videos on youtube.

7 Things That I Plan To Do Before I Die
1. Go Parasailing. Okay-that was Trisha's answer, but I want to, too so I'm copying.
2. Play Somewhere Over the Rainbow on guitar. The Eva Cassidy version.
3. Run a marathon
4. Figure out what the heck happened to my iphoto stuff. Stupid computers.
5. Find a job
6. Eat lots of steak
7. Perfect an Australian accent

I tag whoever wants to do this---or anyone who answers to the name of Buffy.

Wednesday, September 24, 2008

I Want The Sidekick

Not that phone thing---I have no need for such frivolities. I have no clue how to use such frivolities.

No, what I mean is I want the sidekick in the movies. He's always my favorite character: sometimes it's because he's the funny one that makes the movie worth watching, and sometimes it's because he's the one supporting the main character-making him become the awesome person he can be. The proverbial backbone, if you will.

For example, Tommy in Invincible. Or, Matthew Fox's character in We Are Marshall. Plus, he's a little bit of a red-head in that movie and what you may not know about me is that I'm a sucker for red-heads.

Which brings me to my next sidekick: Lyle/Napster on Italian Job. You can tell me you don't want to hang out with a guy as hilarious as that--but I won't believe you.
"You'll never shut down the real Napster."

Another favorite sidekick is Lenny from That Thing You Do.
"Where was I? Oh...playing songs on my guitar."

And speaking of songs on guitars---Kevin Jonas. People (and by that I mean teenaged girls) say that Joe is the cute one, but they're fully wrong.

Last, I would be remiss if I failed to mention the sidekick that started it all. He's tough as anything but loyal, too. "I say, that what you say, is what I say." That's right-Spot Conlin from Newsies. In honor of him, I found the following video on youtube. I don't know what's worse: the fact that someone had time to make the video, or the fact that the random searches I do led me to this. I tried to post it, but I still don't know just click on the link and enjoy!

Saturday, September 20, 2008

I Think it's Permanent

I have a cankle.

But just one. And I don't like it.

It all started a few months back when I rolled my ankle during soccer---and it swelled (swolled?) up like a big balloon. Well, it went back down to the size of a smaller balloon, and now that's how it remains. I mean, we're talking about six months ago. Why's it still big? Why do my legs have to be uneven now? It looks funny.

So today, I was playing soccer again, and I got kicked on the other side of my ankle. So, now my already-bigger-than-the-normal-size-ankle, is bigger. And I bet it's permanent, too. Dang soccer. If I didn't think it was the best sport ever in the whole world, I'd hate it.

So, does anybody know how to un-swell ankles? Or, if you have general un-swelling advice I supposed I could apply it to other areas of my body that may not have been injured but are larger than I would prefer.

Monday, September 15, 2008

Drink With Me, To Days Gone By

No-I don't actually want you to drink with me. Unless you're wanting to drink Stephen's Hot Chocolate cuz that stuff is tasty!

I went and saw Les Mis at Tuacahn recently and it was amazing. While they sang "Drink With Me" I started thinking, reminiscing if you will, about the past. Whenever I get asked the question "what superpower would I want if I could have one"(oddly enough it's a common question) rather than wish for flight or mind-reading, I wish for the ability to control time. Mostly I think this would be really handy when I have to wake up early in the morning. I could freeze time, sleep as long as I wanted, and then get up.

Also, it'd be nice to fast forward through awkward blind dates.

But, would I ever use the rewind option? I mean, granted it'd be nice to go back in time and avoid stupid mistakes, or remind yourself that you really don't need to eat a ton of junk food, or drive home a different way so you don't get in that accident. Right? But then again, you'd have to re-live all the other stuff, too. (You can't just fast forward back to where you were: my game, my rules.)

Would being able to go back, knowing what you know now, and hang out with that one guy, or avoid going to that certain party, or never watch the "Nanny Diaries" cuz it was the stupidest movie ever, be worth having to re-write your papers, re-take your final exams or re-live other painful moments? Or is it better to just learn from your experiences, remember the good times and not wish for a repeat?

If you had a chance to go back, would you?

Tuesday, September 9, 2008

Blind Dates = Not Happenin'

Guy I Have A Crush On and Hope Will Ask Me Out: "Hey Barbaloot, watcha doing on Friday night?"
Me: "Oh, no set plans. Why?"
Guy I Have A Crush On and Hope Will Ask Me Out: "My friend has an extra ticket to the opera and needs a date. Will you go with him?"
...Backed myself right into that corner didn't I?

Well-Intentioned Acquaintance: "I have a friend I want you to set you up with. I think you'd be good together."
Me: "Oh? Why's that?"
Well-Intentioned Acquaintance: "Well, you're both single."
...Word to the wise---similar dating status does not necessarily lead to compatibility.

Brother: "Hey, a lady that I know but you don't saw you for .2 seconds yesterday in your work-out clothes and wants to set you up with her friend's son that she doesn't really know." (I may have edited that one a little-but the facts are all there.)
Me: "Well, I can't begin to think of one reason for not going on that date." (Are you catchin' my sarcasm here, cuz I'm layin' it on pretty thick.)
...For the record, you should probly know both people that you're trying to set up. And fairly well.

Unspecified Parent: "Hey, favorite daughter. One of my work associates has a son that's about to travel cross-country to attend medical school. I'd like you to go out with him"
Me: "Honored Parent...I'd rather not."
...Offspring of fellow workers do not necessarily a match in heaven make.

I can count on one finger the amount of blind dates that have resulted in success. Props to Nicole and Tristan!

My other unspecified parent insists that being set up on a blind date is a compliment. While this may (heavy emphasis on "may") be true when you're 19-21ish, I'm of the opinion that when you're....well, NOT 19-21ish, it's less of a compliment and more along the lines of "I-need-to-find-someone-that's-not-too-young-for-the-guy-who-wants-me-to-set-him-up."

In conclusion, while I'm sure people have the best of intentions when they want to set you up, we all know where the road paved with good intentions will take us.

Sunday, September 7, 2008

I Will Not Watch 90210

I Will Not Watch 90210
I Will Not Watch 90210

Picture me writing that out on a chalkboard over and over and over.

Here's the thing: I will freely admit that I enjoy TV and the mindless escape that it sometimes affords. I am fascinated by reality TV and the stupid things people will do knowing that the whole world will likely see them. I LOVE the Disney channel. It's cheesy and silly and sometimes too ridiculous even for me-but it cracks me up, nonetheless. And I enjoy the WB on occasion. Back in the day I was a hardcore "Buffy" fan, I definitely had my "Gilmore Girls" era and I still have a little bit of a crush on Tom Welling/Clark Kent from "Smallville." (But please do not get me started on the stupidness that was "Dawson's Creek" and '"Felicity"! Yuck.)

But I personally think the newest "idea" for the next generation of 90210 is disgusting. The original "90210" was insanely popular and pushed the envelope for TV back then. (If only that type of stuff were still pushing the envelope instead of being the norm these days.) The new "90210" looks like it will carry that pushing ten times further. I think it's awful that the producers are so excited to pander to the base audiences' desire for anything gratuitous and exploit the young actors/actresses, who should know better but probably do not, for their looks and desires for fame. I honestly would not be surprised if they manage to be the first cable network show that drops the F-bomb without punishment.

That being said, I refuse to watch that show.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm going to step off my proverbial soap box and go watch "Wizards of Waverly Place."

Tuesday, September 2, 2008

What's the Difference?

So, I'm washing my hair last night. I finish rinsing the shampoo and reach for my conditioner and when I picked up the bottle, guess what was written on it? Lotion. That's right. For the past two weeks I've been putting lotion in my hair instead of conditioner. And you know what? I didn't even notice a difference. Sweet.

On a completely different note, but kind of related to the last post, Mark Paul Gosselaar is now in a new show on TNT called "Raising the Bar."

They totally stole that phrase from President Hinckley.

Anyway, my question is this: how can you be off filming my "Saved By The Bell" reunion show when you're busy being in a new series?

Not cool.