I'm a little uptight right now. It's almost 6:00 a.m. and I haven't fallen asleep yet. It all started this afternoon. I got a text from one of my new roommates (remember how I bought a house? I have people that live in it that pay me rent now) saying her dad had bought her a TV and where should she put it. Well, that's nice and all...but there is already a TV down in the family room. I wrote back and told her I didn't want it in the living room. I grew up in a house where the piano was in the living room and pianos and TVs don't mix. I'd like to keep it that way. So, I told her she could just put it in her room if she wanted because there really wasn't any other place. She suggested putting it where the current TV is...but I told her that didn't make a lot of sense, cuz then where would that TV go? Right? So that conversation was all by text. Then later, I talked to her on my lunch break. Again, said I didn't want the TV in the living room, there was one in the family room...cool that her dad bought her a TV, but she either has to store it or put it in her room. Clear enough, right?
Okay-so I get home from seeing a movie with my friends later on that night (Dear John-lamest movie ever. Except for the Notebook which nothing could be worse than that...anyway) I walk in and guess what? The TV her dad bought her is in the place of my TV that I set up in my living room in my house! What?! Gosh-and my mother thinks I'm passive aggressive? I think this girl takes the cake on that! And, she had unpacked all my movies and put them in the entertainment center that apparently came with her TV. I guess that was nice of her? And she even alphabetized them. But do you know what? I already had them split up into genres and THEN alphabetized. It took me quite a while to get them that way, too. So, I came in and she's watching a movie, and basically I'm kinda speechless. In addition, I don't do confrontation well. Not to mention the fact that I live with this girl and I don't want things to be awkward. Then again, it's my house! Right?
So, where does that leave us? Well, I don't know about you---but it leaves me with one entirely sleepless night, which has never been the case for me before. Not even when I was in school when people supposedly pull all nighters. Seriously, I've slept zero. But I did go down to my family room and fix all my movies back how I want them. But guess what? She threw out the boxes they were in! Why are they still in boxes? Well, I just bought a house---and so things like DVD and book shelves haven't quite made it onto my grocery list at this point. I'm slowly getting the feel of my house and where I want things to go and movies have taken a back seat in the priority process. I want them back in their boxes! And I want my TV back where it belongs! So I've decided when she wakes up today that I'll say I appreciate her efforts at organizing my movies, it was nice of her dad to send a TV, but would she please put my TV back where it belongs. I really hope this goes over okay. Cross your fingers that I survive confrontation and get some sleep tomorrow night.
And seriously-don't waste your money on seeing Dear John. Lame.
18 comments:
WHAT WHAT WHAT> Has that girl lost her mind???? you put your tv were you want it sista!!!!
I am so sad that you didn't like the movie. I am going to see it tonight!
Good luck today!
My blood started boiling just reading this. Sheesh! This will be the struggle of roommates, I guess. Maybe you should be super-specific in your contract and mention things like furniture and appliances and layout of the house, etc.
If I were you I would have a chat and get it over with, so you can get this settled. That or put her stuff on the porch, in ABC order, of course.
Yeah, that was pretty gutsy of her to do. But it's definitely YOUR home, and you will have to set the boundaries, cuz otherwise your roommates will walk all over you (like she is obviously trying to do).
Good luck!
Being young and single is one of the best and most fun times in life EXCEPT when you have to deal with room mate drama! I totally sympathize with you! I am so not about confrontation (like you) but this is one where you really need to bite the bullet and lay down the law. If she gets offended- oh well! There are plenty of other good room mates out there ;) It's like taking off a bandaid, just do it quickly and get it over with- no more sleepless nights!
p.s. my 18 year old daughter went and saw Dear John last night too and came home as disgusted as you did..haha - she should have listened to her mother- it was Nicholas Sparks for heaven sakes!!!
Oh, I can feel your pain. I don't like confrontation either, but I've gotten better at being assertive as I've gotten older. It makes it doubly hard when you have to live with them!
Good luck!
Hmm. It's probably easier to live with room mates when none of you own the house you're living in, eh? It's gotta be hard to balance what you want in your house, and what the others might want as well.
It definitely seems that while you need be open to having SOME of their things in the rest of the house (they still need to feel comfortable in places outside their bedroom and that's hard to do when they feel like nothing there is theirs), things as big as a TV when you already have one just don't belong.
I'm glad you had the attitude of approaching it with a focus on her good intentions in doing things. Hopefully that helped to ease the awkwardness.
Oh my boundaries!!! I sat here reading this with my mouth wide open in shock! Now I am the queen of no confrontations, but I am getting over it. For your own sanity you need to get this out in the open and let her know that boundaries have been crossed. It stinks. But you will feel better in the long run. Promise. And thanks for the warning about Dear John.
My son wants to buy a condo and have roommates. He's thinking since it's his place, the roommates would respect things more and he'd rule the roost! Maybe I should have him read this post! I'll keep my fingers crossed for you and hopefully you can catch a nap today.
BTW, good to have you back.
ugh! What a mess! I m sorry barb!
This is wrong on so many levels! Unless she is paying half of EVERYTHING...it's your house and your rules. Switch it back while she is gone!!! hehehe
Wow! I think that was pretty nervy of her. I say get your space back by moving her out of it.
Talk about rude.
There is a big difference between being "nice" and being "polite." You can certainly *politely* tell her that it is your house, your rules, even if she is paying rent. If she doesn't like it, tell her to move somewhere else.
She is renting a room. Her stuff can go in her room. Period. End of story. If she complains, let her know that you will give her until the end of the month to get right out.
My blood isn't quite boiling, but it's warmer than normal in your honor.
I don't blame you one little bit. Stay strong and keep us updated on how it goes.
So wait....where did she put your TV? In the living room where you don't want a TV at all (and by the way, I sooooooo agree with you on that. There will never be a television in my living room)?
I would be so angry, and I also have a huge issue with confrontation. But the bottom line is that it is your house. Not only is it yours, but you will still have it long after she moves out. She needs to realize that you have the final say on things like this, the end.
Good luck in dealing with it. I hope it turns out well, I know it can be so awkward and since you have to live with this person you don't want to rock the boat. But, either she has bad feelings about you, or you have bad feelings about her. I think I'd prefer the former and have my TV where I want it.
ok I'm getting caught up in the drama here...I'm going to read your newest post. Well at least she got you blogging again, right?
That sucks Barbs! I would've been pretty stinkin mad, but like you would've avoided confrontation and let it boil and stew! I hope that things are still okay with you and that next time she doesn't just think that you're kidding when you say no to something! Good luck!
Oh my goodness...seriously, you are WAY too nice. She would be out on her REAR!!!!!!!!! What a JERK! And she threw away the boxes to your DVD's!?!?! Seriously, no respect. I can't believe that. I can't believe you didn't blow up immediately. You were probably very shocked though. Oh wow! I can't wait to hear what she says and if the TV does get moved!
Oh my goodness! I'm shocked. What a weird drama.
So, my daughter hated Dear John too. High Five.
And I thought the Notebook was lame too.
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